Will it Never End?

Yesterday I took my daughter in for her 6 month checkup. all went well and she is finally back on her growth chart for her weight. YAY!!! I have the most AMAZING pediatrician ever. She asked how my son was doing. I began to tell her his measurements that his nutritionist had taken the previous day. She, once again, was worried about him.

A little back story:
At 10 months my son was diagnosed with dysphagia, eosinophilic esophagitis, severe reflux, and NUMEROUS food allergies. He was put on an elemental formula to help him gain weight and grow.


So she asks what hes eating. Hes been off of the formula for almost 2 months and is on soymilk and regular foods. I have been adding as many calories as I can to his milk. He gets a decent amount of calories and is still not growing. He hasn't grown in months. She then tells me she wants to test his thyroid and hormone levels. Upon the results of that he may need a growth hormone. Ok. easy enough. Then she kinda drops a bomb on me.

"I want to run a sweat test."
Me, "What does that test for?"
Doc, "Cystic Fibrosis."
Me, "ok."

Now, I'd heard "cystic fibrosis" before. It wasn't until I got home and looked it up that I remembered what it was. I immediately began to cry. When I got to the line that read "average life expectancy, 35 years", I lost it. I know she is just testing him to be sure. A lot of his symptoms would fit that diagnosis. I feel confident that he doesn't have it, but in the back of my mind I know there is still a small chance that could be the case. All I could think was that my poor little boy would never be able to have a normal life.

My husband keeps telling me not to worry and just wait for the test. "He probably doesn't have it" I wish I were as cool and confident as he is. As a mom, all I can think about are the "possibles". It's POSSIBLE he may have it... It's POSSIBLE he doesn't. I just wish we could get a definitive answer to his problems. all doctors involved agree that they havn't seen a case like my son before. He is unique.

For the next week or so I know that though I may try to hold it together, all I will do is worry. I pray the days go by fast and we can be at peace with whatever the outcome may be.